Sapphy
Full Member
I'll die living just as free as my hair.
Posts: 1,514
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Post by Sapphy on Aug 20, 2011 0:36:06 GMT -5
"I know," Sapphy said, a little irritated despite herself.
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Post by raven on Aug 20, 2011 0:38:37 GMT -5
"I'm being honest...he's a great guy, really," Raven said and she was completely serious.
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Sapphy
Full Member
I'll die living just as free as my hair.
Posts: 1,514
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Post by Sapphy on Aug 20, 2011 0:41:29 GMT -5
"No. Really. I know he's a great guy," Sapphy said, meeting Raven's eyes. "He's my best friend at the lodge. I know your relationship with him. I know he's a great guy."
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Post by raven on Aug 20, 2011 0:43:05 GMT -5
"But?" Raven questioned. She knew there was a but in there somewhere.
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Sapphy
Full Member
I'll die living just as free as my hair.
Posts: 1,514
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Post by Sapphy on Aug 20, 2011 0:45:22 GMT -5
"I'm not interested. In anybody," she quickly amended.
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Post by raven on Aug 20, 2011 0:50:57 GMT -5
"Okay no you're gonna tell me why." Raven said with a smirk.
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Sapphy
Full Member
I'll die living just as free as my hair.
Posts: 1,514
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Post by Sapphy on Aug 20, 2011 0:52:16 GMT -5
"I just don't care, Raven," she sighed. "I cannot muster the energy to care or want a relationship. I prefer to be alone."
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Post by raven on Aug 20, 2011 0:57:26 GMT -5
"Okay, now you're not being honest. Are you scared you'll get attached to someone and it will make you care about another human being other than yourself?" Raven asked her.
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Sapphy
Full Member
I'll die living just as free as my hair.
Posts: 1,514
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Post by Sapphy on Aug 20, 2011 1:03:04 GMT -5
"I'm being honest. Okay, I guess about the alone thing, sure. But I'm content being around friends. Why does it have to be with a boyfriend? And I care about other people," Sapphy said. She only explained this to two other people before and they didn't understand it either. "I just don't care about me with other people."
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Post by raven on Aug 20, 2011 1:04:47 GMT -5
"Okay," Raven said with a shrug, "I get it. It's hard to give up a little bit of your freedom. I've been with someone so long I have no idea what it's like to be alone."
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Sapphy
Full Member
I'll die living just as free as my hair.
Posts: 1,514
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Post by Sapphy on Aug 20, 2011 1:06:31 GMT -5
"I have more important things to think about, anyway. I'm not even interested in sex anymore, Raven."
Oh wait, was that the wrong thing to say? Sapphy pursed her lips together, kicking herself.
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Post by raven on Aug 20, 2011 1:09:40 GMT -5
"Neither am I, which is becoming a problem..." Raven said with a sigh.
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Sapphy
Full Member
I'll die living just as free as my hair.
Posts: 1,514
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Post by Sapphy on Aug 20, 2011 1:11:41 GMT -5
"Wanna talk about it?" Sapphy asked empathetically. "I'll start if it helps. I look at boys like a little girl would. 'Oooh, he's pretty. I'd like to kiss him.' But that's it. I tried to have sex, but I can't come. Like. At all. I enjoy it... Okay, I guess? But that's it."
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Post by raven on Aug 20, 2011 1:19:29 GMT -5
"Oh man, you are not fucking the right men." Raven said with a sigh. "Spot was like an entirely new and wonderful sexual moment. He's the only man who'se made me cum." Raven nodded. "And I can't do it because I just...when I get aroused I start feeling disgusting...like bugs crawling over my skin. It's completely me. I know he won't hurt me, in my heart I know he won't, but my body won't let me do it."
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Sapphy
Full Member
I'll die living just as free as my hair.
Posts: 1,514
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Post by Sapphy on Aug 20, 2011 1:21:44 GMT -5
Sapphy shook her head.
"I wish it were that easy. I just... I feel like my body doesn't belong to me. I feel like I'm in someone else's skin. I feel so... Numbed."
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