Visions of you (open)

[Trixie]

"That I'm gonna cheer ya up." She said it in between nibbling on his neck. "Or at least distract you for a while."

[Nate]

"How are you going to do that?" He asked as an uneasy feeling started to develop in the pit of his stomach. What was he doing? He barely knew this girl, surely she couldn't suggesting what he thought she was. No, that wouldn't do. He couldn't allow her to do this -- even if she wasn't going to feel guilty about it, he certainly knew that he would!

He turned his head back so he was looking at her, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips. "You've already cheered me up," he remarked calmly.

[Trixie]

She arched a brow at him slowly, regarding him, then sighed and pulled back. "And they say girls are complicated."

[Nate]

"I never claimed to be easy to figure out," he replied with a chuckle. He shrugged his shoulders casually and withdrew his arms from around her. "I just want to know what you've got in mind, that's all..."

[Trixie]

She lifted a shoulder. "I like kissin' on ya, Nate. Figured we'd feel each other up for a while. But it seems like you don't wanna."

[Nate]

Nate sighed, his head lowering. He had never met a girl like this before -- most of the girls he had met through the years wouldn't even let you kiss them, let alone 'feel up' on them. "I... I barely know you," he reminded her softly. "Don't you feel even the slightest bit strangely about that?"

[Trixie]

She knitted her brows, momentarily confused. "Why should I? I like you, you like me. It's natural, so why feel bad about it?"

[Nate]

"I may like you and you may like me, but we really only just met," he replied with another shrug of his shoulders. This girl's logic was beginning to confuse and bewilder him. "You don't have any reservations about this? At all? Not even slightly wondering whether or not I'm going to be as nice of a guy as I claim to be?"

[Trixie]

She gave him an incredulous look. "Honey, trust me, you're just as nice as ya say you are. You couldn't be mean if ya tried." She sighed, shaking a hand through her hair. "Look, Nate. I know you have this weird sense of honor, but we're not kids. We can do things 'cause we want to without havin' to feel guilty about it. No one's gettin' hurt over this."

[Nate]

Nate let out a sigh, his head shaking slowly. How could anyone in their right mind see absolutely nothing wrong with getting so close to someone they literally just met? Maybe he was too moral. Maybe he was still too invested in doing the right thing, despite what Trixie was telling him. However, he wasn't about to give in to her logic. "No," he replied after a rather lengthy pause. "I can't let this happen."

He picked up his flask and slowly rose to his feet once more. After slipping the flask into his pocket, he brushed the dust off of his pantlegs. "I can't let myself give in just for the sake of loneliness. It's not fair to you to do something like that. You might think that's okay, and that's fine by me. Maybe I'm a little old-fashioned in my beliefs as far as this goes, but I still believe in doing the right thing. Doing the right thing isn't 'feelin' up' on a girl the same day you meet her. You can tell me I'm wrong all you want, and maybe I am, but I think you're worth more than that."

[Trixie]

She scrambled to her feet, staring at him. "The right thing? Meanin' that doin' what I do is the wrong thing." She pursed her lips at him. "Don't go playin' the stand-up guy when you're sayin' things to make me feel ashamed a' myself. You live in your lonliness, Nate, 'cause you're comfortable there. It's easier tellin' yourself bein' with a girl ain't right, then admittin' you're scared a' what bein' with her means."

[Nate]

"I'm not saying that what you're doin' is the wrong thing," he replied defensively. "I'm just sayin' it's the wrong thing for me!" He shoved his hands into his pockets, his concealed hands balling up into frustrated fists. He had almost forgotten how quickly girls could misinterpret something he said and turn it into the complete opposite of what he was trying to mean.

He swallowed hard, remaining silent for a moment as he tried to gather his thoughts. "I'm not trying to make you feel ashamed," he continued, his voice softer. "If you think that's what I meant by it, then I'm sorry. Maybe this is right for everybody else in this city, but I know it's not right for me."

"That's not to say I don't like you," he continued, his eyes firmly fixed on his shoes. "What I meant was that I like you too much to let this happen so quickly. Call it what you want. Call it scared. Call it bein' ashamed. Maybe it's a mix of all of those things. I just don't want to do this only to toss it aside like it's nothin'."

He turned away from Trixie and took a step toward the hatch. When did he become so disconnected from the female mind that all the right things he used to say became the wrong things? "I didn't mean to upset you. Honest."

[Trixie]

She sighed, softening. "Nate...things don't gotta be that complicated." Trixie was a firm believer in connecting with people -- not too closely mind you. When too many emotions got involved, it took all the fun out of it. That's why sex was the perfect middle ground. You couldn't get closer to a person than when you were with them physically, but it wasn't permanent. It was perfect.

[Nate]

"That's what I'm tryin' to do -- keep it from getting complicated," he answered softly, his back still to her. At least, that's what he thought he was trying to do. "Just, umm, just outta curiosity, how would you keep this free of complications?"

[Trixie]

She looked at his back a minute, then walked over to him, sliding her arms around his waist from behind and pressing a kiss to the middle of his back. "It starts by not havin' any expectations. Just...feel."